What Lights You Up? Purpose, Paychecks, and Practicing Discernment

Kelly Herron
Nov 1
3 min read

Last week on Grey’s Anatomy, Bailey looks at Warren with that steady Bailey gaze that cuts through the noise and says, in essence: “If it lights you up like that, it’s worth it.”

That line has been humming in me ever since. Not because life is a highlight reel—it isn’t—but because our work asks something real of us: pay the bills and keep your soul awake.

Two Truths We Hold at Once

Reality: Money matters. Research shows income is linked to life evaluation and, for most people, even daily emotional well-being continues to rise as income rises. (PNAS study)

Also true: Passion matters—but how it shows up matters more. Decades of research distinguish harmonious passion (energizing, values-aligned, integrates well with life) from obsessive passion (consuming, conflict-creating). The goal isn’t “all passion, all the time,” but the right kind of passion, in the right proportion.

So is “do what you love” good advice? Sometimes. Skill-building and job crafting—reshaping your role to fit your strengths—can generate meaning and, yes, kindle passion. You don’t have to nuke your career to feel alive at 9:30 a.m. next Tuesday.

Why Some Folks Keep Passion Outside Their Paycheck

Keeping a beloved activity separate from paid work can protect it as a nervous-system reset. There’s solid evidence that psychological detachment—mentally stepping away from work—reduces exhaustion and boosts well-being. (Frontiers in Psychology study)

And Why Others Bring Passion Into Their Paycheck (At Least Halfway)

For many, integrating passion into half or so of paid work is the sweet spot: energizing overall, still spacious enough for rest and family. If jumping to a dream role isn’t feasible, job crafting is your friend—reshaping tasks, relationships, and how you frame your contributions to make today’s role more meaningful. Some also diversify with a portfolio career (teaching + coaching + part-time consulting, etc.) to balance income, purpose, and flexibility. (Forbes: Portfolio Career)

Ignatian Discernment: A Whole-Self Way to Decide

Ignatius of Loyola’s method doesn’t shout; it listens—to your thoughts, emotions, body, memories, and the patterns of your days.

Notice consolation vs. desolation. Where do you experience movement toward hope, love, generativity (consolation)? What consistently pulls you toward fear, bitterness, depletion (desolation)? Learn more at IgnatianSpirituality.com or Loyola Press.
Practice the Daily Examen. Five simple steps—presence, gratitude, review, feelings, tomorrow—help you sift what’s truly life-giving from what’s merely loud. (Ignatian Examen guide)
Make a grounded choice. The Ignatian method invites you to name the decision, gather data, weigh pros/cons in prayerful reflection, and seek confirmation. It’s structured and soulful—perfect for career calls with real stakes. (Framework for Making a Decision)

My “Lights-Me-Up” List (and an Invitation)

I’ve known numb seasons—years where I functioned well, even liked my life, but felt… flat. Discernment—and a lot of honest questions—helped me name what sparks: coaching, teaching at a community college, fostering dogs, nature, my children.

That’s my mix. What about yours?

Try this simple reflection:

Name three tasks that leave you lighter after doing them.
Name three that reliably drain you.
Ask: Where do I sense consolation? Where is there desolation?
Experiment: Craft one element of your current job toward the “lighter” list for the next two weeks.
Review nightly with an Examen. What changed?

Root to Rise: Bringing It All Together

At Root to Rise, we hold a both/and:

Root in reality—budgets, obligations, health insurance, tuition. Money supports a life.
Rise in purpose—follow what lights you up, but steward it with wisdom.
Design your blend—maybe your passion lives outside work as a needed reset; maybe it’s half your paid role; maybe you craft your current job into a better fit; maybe you build a portfolio career.
Discern in motion—use your whole self (body, emotions, thoughts, beliefs, experience) to listen for what leads you toward life. Then take one small, honest step.

If it lights you up like that—it’s worth paying attention.

---Sending love and light from KRH at The Human Coach, because being human is wild.

References & Further Reading

Discerning a path to discover what lights me up.

Root to Rise | Coaching with The Human Coach